Classroom God Virus

(Make Love Not War XXX)

Scientific observation has revealed that social interactions among bonobos are far less hostile than among common chimps. This is not to say that bonobos never fight; they just do so a lot less. Unlike common chimps (and humans, of course), bonobos have never been observed deliberately killing members of their own species. Among bonobos observed both in the wild and in captivity, sex and mutual pleasure are keys to keeping the peace, reinforcing social relations based upon the give and take of sensual, erotic pleasure rather than on pain and force and fear. Apparently, all that hot sex just cools ‘em out.
Though common chimpanzees only partake in basic reproductive sex, bonobos share all kinds of sexual pleasures, including cunnilingus, fellatio, masturbation, massage, bisexuality, incest, body-licking, sex in different positions, group sex, and lots of long, deep, wet, soulful, French kissing. Bonobo "ladies" strengthen their friendships through "lesbian" sex, frequently performing what researchers call "genito-genital rubbing." The Mogandu people have a much more appealing, expressive name for this act of rapidly rubbing their large sensitive clitorises and labia against each other: hoka-hoka. Bonobo females grow closer to each other as they do the hoka-hoka, consolidating their social connections along with their orgasms. These highly sexed females are also far more likely to initiate sex with the males than any other great ape females (including humans!). So the bonobo guys get a pretty good deal: Give the ladies some respect, and get plenty of sex, all year ‘round.
Moreover, since the males do get plenty of sex—from confident, horny females who disguise their ovulation time—they don’t compete with each other so much. That is, male bonobos don’t seem to partake in the deadly "wars," raiding parties and other acts of ape "terrorism" so prevalent among male common chimps, and humans. They also tend to resolve any conflicts they might have by mounting each other or engaging in oral or manual sex. As Dr. Franz de Waal points out in Bonobo: The Forgotten Ape, "common chimps resolve sexual issues with power. Bonobos resolve power issues with sex." The latter seems to be safer and more fun for everyone.
While many have debated over whether humans are more closely related to chimps or bonobos, others still deny the concept that humans have evolved from a natural biological process at all and have insisted that the entire universe was been created on a seven day bender by an anal-retentive Father God who punishes people for seeking knowledge and having a good time. This theory is quite a bummer compared to many of the paganistic , poletheistic, and esoteric belief systems that have come before it and various interpretations of it have been accepted by a disappointingly large amount of people.